I think he knows me. He knows of my stumble-tongue in regards to spoken words in the moment. I can not help but to apologize for that fault; I have never been good with words other than the tangible ones. Even though I have told him so, I'm not sure if he knows.
There is never enough to be said. A picture may be worth a thousand words but a thought can be told in a million ways. A single tongue can only know so many words, and it has always been difficult to find just the right ones that would help him understand, ones that would even help me to know just exactly what I mean. So I tell myself what I think I know, or what I want to think, or know to have thought. I tell myself of the thoughts thought, the thoughts that dwelled, and the thoughts known. Here is what I know.
We are not alone. I can not single you out, because it isn't only you that feels this way. We are not alone. Through your Iris the truth attempts to defy itself. It speaks to you in words that call you a Nobody, a Nothing, a Misunderstanding. Stabbing whispers pierce deeper than the cold blade that drips of your dark blood. Not even the remedy of salty tears can cleanse these wounds, not when they are bound within the depths of the heart. The lies whisper sounds inaudible, calling their mocking laugh, yet there is only one thing to be heard…you are forever trapped in your despair of sin.
This can't become honesty, it is merely depravity, despondency, distress, anguish, misery, sorrow, tribulation, calamity, anxiety, agony…sadness…loneliness. These can speak louder than any truth when you allow it. When you fall to the ground in your own blood, sweat and tears, you're not the only Nobody down there. When you fall, we fall together, in an embrace of anguish, so defiant to ignore the lies that cloud our judgment and perception of what we know as reality, to overrule. We turn to the same truth that murders the deception, the same thought we know as one trustworthy honesty. We are not alone.
The truth our Iris' perceive is the one we share. I will always be there for you.